Just looking around at pictures on Facebook where everyone looks so happy...
Tonight's a night when I just want to cuddle with someone. I felt fine, but I went to coffee with sme friends and I just felt...single. Now I just want someone to cuddle with. To put their arms around me. I'm normally fine being single (recently, anyway). But I just...ugh. I have no way to combat this. Isn't this when I'm supposed to pamper myself? Yeah, fine. Okay. But it won't feel like someone's holding me. That's what I want.
I'll get through this. I always do. I just always wonder why I don't have this...what is so wrong with me that I don't deserve it? I was reading in one of my women's studies books that women look to men to save them, legitimize them, direct them. And, yeah. I feel that way. It also feels foreign to NOT look to men for that. I've looked to men for those things, and they've failed me. I always took that to mean that it was my fault. Logically I know that it can't be ALL my fault. But I also can't place blame on the men - the one's that are supposed to guide me.
Whatever.
Monday, March 05, 2007
I'm a little sad.
Posted by jill_renae at 8:47 PM
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